As I sat in my in my warm recliner last night, staring out at the blizzard that has enveloped my hometown, I began to ponder several of the winter sports which will soon be in full swing. After another cup of coffee (laced with a little bourbon, perhaps), my mind eventually wandered to the NBA, of which I am a fledgling fan.

Inevitably, the two topics intertwined and mingled in the slight whiskey warmth, and this half-formed bastard of an idea sprang forth – If several of pro basketball’s best known personas were to take on a winter sport, which would it be? Here are my thoughts. Let me know what you think.

Kobe Bryant – Snow Shoeing

You’d need some pretty huge snowshoes. But once you strapped them on his feet, the Black Mamba would be off and running. Plus, imagine the awesome cardio and stamina training he’d get. Once he sheds the shoes and sets foot on a basketball court, he’d be like Usain Bolt on the hardwood.

Steve Nash – Figure Skating

He’s got the flair for it, no question. Nash’s run and gun persona would be perfect for the ice. In fact, why not just get the whole Phoenix roster on skates? “Suns on the Ice” – The marketing practically writes itself.

Dirk Nowitzki – Curling

This really doesn’t need much explanation. Just close your eyes and imagine big, monstourous Dirk shouting at the curling stone to slow down as he pummels the ice with his broom.

Shaquille O’Neal – Ice Fishing

No one, and I mean no one, would be a better ice-fisherman than Shaq. Come on, man. The fish would swim up to the hole just to hear him talk. He could sit out there all day in the shanty with the little wood stove, mumbling to himself all day long about Kobe and his damn snowshoes. And with those huge hands, he could probably punch right through the surface of the ice and palm three full grown blue-gills, no problem.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I must go participate in my own winter sport – digging my car out for a trip to the grocery store.

- Taylor Maxwell

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Tags | Basketball, NBA, winter sports